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Poetry and snark blogger who also has a creative side (who knew?)

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Dance Your Pants Off

Breaking news!!! Due to my phenomenal internet scouring prowess, I became privy to a piece of earth shattering information that is of vital importance to us all. Why our regularly scheduled TV programming was not interrupted in order to broadcast this momentous announcement is unclear to me, but I believe that once you hear it, you too will recognize its tremendous significance and the staggering implications it carries for the very foundations on which our society is built.  Ready? Sitting down? Ladies, have you emptied your bladders?   

Okay, here goes: Researchers at the Northumbria University in England and the University of Gottingen in Germany have preliminary data suggesting that women are most attracted to men who have big, flamboyant dance moves! Wait! There's more! The study further concludes that "attractive human dance moves, particularly those of males, have been reported to show associations with measures of physical strength, prenatal androgenization and symmetry." I know, I was dumbfounded myself when I first read this article, but THIS IS SCIENTIFIC RESEARCH!!! 
What physical strength, prenatal androgenization, and symmetry!
 These dedicated researchers didn't just send a bunch of white lab coated she-scientists to Chippendale's for a night out, they did a real experiment and collected real data! They used "advanced three-dimensional motion-capture technology to identify possible biomechanical differences between women's perceptions of ‘good’ and ‘bad’ male dancers." And what, exactly, did this advanced 3-D motion-capture technology discover? Women prefer men who move their necks, torsos, and right knees a lot when they dance. Who knew? Apparently, John Travolta did in Saturday Night Fever. And Napoleon Dynamite! According to this study's hypothesis, these men(?) may give off  "signals of male quality in terms of health, vigour or strength" that may be of utmost importance to courting rituals and ultimately mating. So, guys, if you want to get that girl, work on your dancing, particularly your neck, torso, and right knee moves.

Napoleon Dynamite Dance Scene
Watch Napoleon demonstrate his mating rituals!

I guess this study also explains the dance stylings displayed by the openly gay Cazwell in his video "Ice Cream Truck."  Notice that these men, while demonstrating many flamboyant moves, focus on the lower half of the body, particularly the pelvis. Instead of the neck, they move the tongue. Wrong, wrong, wrong! This type of behavior should NOT be perceived as attractive by women according to the research. In the name of science, I've been studying this video closely to see if I agree or disagree with this hypothesis.  So far, I've watched it 27 times...  

Shout out to Annah at Red Means Go for posting this video and for her awesome blog!!!!%29

1 comment:

  1. Oooooo K !
    Bottom line. Tell me if you know what kind of money was paid for this study so that i can take a really good shit for myself! ;0)
    My last good B/M was when i heard how much a study cost to see if the taste of jarred pickles was better with or without the stems on.


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