100th Post: Happy Birthday to You!

I can't believe that I'm up to my 100th blog entry! I've been pondering what to rant about for number 100 and have been tossing up ideas like vibrio infested Chesapeake oysters for over a week now. Number 100 seemed too momentous an occasion to squander on a trifle but then again, that's been the point of most of the rants in this blog thus far!

After giving up entirely for the day, I called my old friend (old, as in I've had her as a friend for a very long time now, and, sorry, girl, but also old, as in this side of 40 today) to wish her a happy birthday. Then it hit me like seagull poo on my head while strolling the streets of Annapolis (this really did happen to me): I will dedicate blog post number 100 to my dear friend Kirsten (aka kirf) on her 46th birthday because she's so special to me and because I haven't mailed her gift yet!

Geez, we were dorks in 1971!

IF I LIVE TO BE 100, I WILL NEVER FORGET...

• Mrs. Yauger's 1st grade class with you in Aspen Hill Elementary School
• Chasing the boys at recess and pulling their hair
• Going to your birthday parties and collecting peanuts in your yard in brown paper bags
• Helping your mother can vegetables at your birthday parties
• Learning the way to your house on Camelot Street
• Helping you decorate your Christmas tree since we didn't have one
• Eating those Norwegian cookies at Christmas that your mom made
• Lefsa
• Your compost heap before they were cool
• "Defensive driving for small cars"
• Reading "The Sensuous Woman" at recess disguised in an "Outsiders" bookcover
• Laughing about "organisms" in science class
• That pervert who touched my leg at your parents' dinner party
• That pervert teacher who made a play for you on our field trip
• Your mother stopping the car in the middle of the Chesapeake Bridge
• Beautiful, downtown Denton and "Denton Days"
• Looking for pin lamps in Delaware
• Singing Little Feat songs on the way to the beach
• Buying "French Hos" perfume for prom
• Trying on my bridesmaid dresses backwards
• Trying fondue for the first time at your house
• Making "squid" donuts
• Happy pigs
• Going to Dairy Queen on the last day of school and getting Peanut Buster Parfaits
• You jumping on the beds at Scan Furniture
• Commander Salamander
• Rocky Horror Picture Show in Gtown
• "Your mother's gay?!!"
• Going to a Joan Armatrading concert and winding up in some guys' house we never met before
• Outer Mongolians
   
  I'm sure there are way more things that I'll remember as soon as I hit the "Publish Post" button, but my dogs are snoring and it's time for bed. So Happy Birthday kirf! And I will send you a real gift some time this month, I promise!