"Let's Get Together!"

"We just have to get together some time soon!" How many times have I heard this line in my adult life? How many times have I known, with all certainty, that the speaker had absolutely no intention of EVER getting together with me?

Like my adolescent hero Holden Caulfield, I can't stomach "phonies." If you meet me and like me and want to get together for coffee or lunch or whatever with me, great! If not, hey, no problemo. What's wrong with saying, "Nice to meet you," and leaving it at that? To quote Holden, "I am always saying 'Glad to've met you' to somebody I'm not at all glad I met. If you want to stay alive, you have to say that stuff, though. " So true. Just don't give me that sing-songy "Let's get together some time!" if you don't mean it because I have no patience for BS.

And PLEASE don't start offering up excuses why you haven't called, emailed, or responded to my offers to get together the next time we see each other at some mutual social occasion. I really don't give a rat's ass that you've been busy with work, your kids have had the flu, or that your mom has had foot surgery. If you had wanted to keep in touch with me in the first place, I would've already known all that and you wouldn't be splurting it all out here now in some pathetic attempt to "catch up." Real friends keep each other apprised of the big events in their lives, if not in person, then via phone, email, blog, etc. If one person can't "get together," for a while, the other generally knows why and doesn't hear a list of vague excuses at a PTA fundraiser.

I don't need or want everyone I meet to be my friend. I'm fine with a small group of friends and a larger group of acquaintances. What I don't want is someone who tries to act like a friend. Don't be a phony!